“So I used to work at Starbuck’s, and different girlfriends of mine would visit me while I was at work, and all my co-workers were these like 18 and 19 y/o boys, and they were like “[Redacted], how are you so good with the ladies? There’s all these hot lesbians all up on you all the time, how do you do it, man?” I was like “Okay, you wanna know the secret?” They’re like “Yeah, yeah, tell me the secret!” I’m all “Okay. START SUCKING DICK. That is how you get the ladies, my friend.” But they didn’t get it. Figures.”
— A very lovely queer gentleman about town. Who, for the record? Really needs his own reality TV show.