• "No girl, I am legit chagrin that HIS DICK WAS INSIDE ME MULTIPLE TIMES. Sometimes I really wish that one could un-cocksuck stupid. Retroactive blowjob denial should be a thing."

Ohmygoodness. David Bowie, Lou Reed, and Gail Ann Dorsey do “Queen Bitch.”

This is delightful for a lot of reasons, but what I really love about it is how everyone is smiling & giggling in this kind of dorky, goofball way. They are so obviously just having an awesome time.

in which i am an extremely bitchy old pervert

  • me: I feel like some people are all WE IZ SRS BDSM
  • Ceasar: AHAHAHAHAHA
  • HAHAH
  • AHAH\
  • ASKDNASD
  • me: I've met way too many Dead Serious Perverts in my life.
  • Ceasar: oh god. im dying.
  • me: Have you never encountered this?!
  • Ceasar: Dead serious what now?
  • And I do hope that these people use lolcat speak when they're trying to say this to you.
  • me: You know, like, the straight white cis dudes with the bad cases of Top's Disease who learned about kink from, like, Dungeons & Dragons, and they wear those black t-shirts with, like, paintings of wolves & full moons on them? And they always have either itty bitty or plush plump nerd girl subs in tow, who are usually way too smart/awesome/hot for them?
  • Ceasar: pajsdohsduiasdubadasd;oaso;dias;dijasd
  • me: I mean, I am not being nice and I am going to hell, clearly, but I feel like This Dude is a common character in pervert circles. This would be why I don't hang out much in the larger kink scene, even though I'm deeply queer and deeply perverse.
  • Ceasar: nskjvnsdkfjbda
  • oh
  • christ
  • Gina.
  • Stahp.
  • me: I apparently hit a nerve? ;)
  • Ceasar: It hurts to laugh.
  • oh god. that's wonderful. Yes. Yes, that's basically the pagan and bdsm community in Georgia
  • Christ have mercy gurl.

2013 Lesson

3 days in, the Big Lesson of 2013 seems to be: Don’t abide by fools, asshats, or bullshit.

(This is ultimately positive! But I am very, very annoyed right now.)

Bowie’s “Queen Bitch,” from Hunky Dory. This is this week’s theme song/inspiration. In so many ways. Especially:

"If she says she can do it, then she can do it — she don’t make false claims!"