Gina

datingdisastersofaqueergirl:

Man, every time someone uses their mental illness as an excuse for why they raped/abused/snitched, a prison guard gets their wings.

Like 90% of my friends are crazy as fuck (myself included) and yet somehow we have all managed to hold ourselves back from being awful.

PREACH.

datingdisastersofaqueergirl:

There are people that exist in your life and they are just it for you. From the moment you meet them, you know, “Yes. Yes. This is it.” I remember the first time I came across the phrase “kindred spirit” when I was 8 years old, reading Anne of Green Gables. They are rare and beautiful people in your life and they are everything.

Andy (boy on the left) is one of those people for me (girl on the right). Ever since we met at Camp Trans 2009, he has been my platonic soul mate. We call each other “brother” and we mean it. 

In the last three months, both of our lives have fallen apart. Some of those things happened in tandem (one of our best friends killed themselves in December) and some of those things have been completely separate (he got in a 4 car pileup just days after the funeral; I watched my neighbor bleed to death in her driveway last Saturday). But he needs me. And I need money.

I live in Oakland. He lives in Michigan. A couple of weeks ago, his partner, with whom he has been for many years, was poisoned. He has an incredibly rare neurological condition called dystonia, and he is now suffering from brain damage. Andy is doing his best to take care of him, but all the stress of the last three months got to him and he had a massive seizure, breaking his arm in two places. His partner now uses a wheelchair and is also having seizures. His partner was also the sole financial provider for the family and obviously can no longer work. My best friend is struggling to keep afloat.

I have been an aid for folks with both physical and neurological disabilities for 6 years. I can help them. I just need to get there. 

I’ve asked for money from tumblr before, to get to my friend’s funeral. Y’all saved me then, and I’m hoping beyond hope that lightening might strike twice. I need a good thing like you would not believe. And flying to Michigan to take care of my friends is that good thing.

I need help buying a plane ticket and making up for the week of work I’ll be missing. My partner and I are way below the poverty line and we could not pay rent if I missed a day of work. So. If you’re able and willing, please consider tossing me like 5 bucks to go take care of the platonic love of my life. If it makes you feel any better, we’re both queer and mad activists, he’s trans, and we’re poor. I’m not above exploiting identity politics to get to him. 

here’s the link to my paypal.  I don’t have the words to properly thank anyone who even considers donating, but thank you. Thank you. 

Gus is just a thoroughly lovely person whose work in the world consistently impresses me & brings me joy. Consider throwing her some love & cash, folks.

datingdisastersofaqueergirl:

The truly awesome thing about all these really petty gross anonymous messages is that this is VINDICATION after years of attractive partners and friends insisting that it is allll in my head that people get real real real mad that someone that looks like me gets mad hot ass.

I cannot tell you how many times I’ve said to a partner, “oh that girl over there is PISSED you’re with me” or “damn they are mean mugging the fuck out of me right now for being on your arm” and that partner has been like, “Are you sure that’s why?” or “they don’t look mad to me, they’re totally smiling at me!”

This is actually what fatphobia looks like in our community, folks. This is why I don’t go to parties. 

And actually, y’all almost had me convinced I was just crazy(er) and I was being oversensitive until one day, ONE BLESSED DAY, my skinny white trans husband and I were at some radical queer event and he leaned over to me and was like, “why does that girl in the black skirt keep glaring at you?” and I was like, “Oh my god. You see it too. I’m not making it up.” and it was ONE OF THE BEST DAYS OF MY LIFE because I FINALLY found someone who believed me and validated me. 

Anyway, stay mad y’all, cuz I’m not gonna stop dating people you think are too cute for me. Sorry for not being sorry.

EVERY WORD OF THIS. YES. I have gotten that exact same mean mug. This is, indeed, how fatphobia works in our community.